Monthly Archive for October, 2012

The top 5 regrets of the dying

First, let me say that I am not a pessimist nor a fatalist. However, I do believe in what I call having 20/20 foresight. When it comes to life, we all know we’re going to die, it’s just a question of how and when. Here’s the thing about not facing your mortality: You might not have as much time as you think OR WORSE, the people you care most about may have less than time than you would like.

After the fact, it’s too late.

After the fact, you can’t do anything about it.

Now, you can. I suggest you listen to the top 5 regrets of the dying to make the most of your life – what’s left of it, which when you think about it – it’s all of it because you CAN’T GO BACK…

I want to thank Mark Mackenzie of The Graffiti Eaters for sending this article to me. He’s an ambitious high achiever who places his family as his top priority, so I know he takes these recommendations to heart as I hope you will too.

The top five regrets of the dying

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me

This was the most common regret of all. When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.

2. I wish I didn’t work so hard

This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.

3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings

Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends

Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier

This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.

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Inspirational video

As you may or may not know, my blog content is more than 50% user generated by readers and subscribers. It means that I get access to literally hundreds of submissions and contributions per year that I would never find on my own. First because I wouldn’t be searching for it and second, I don’t have the breadth and scope to find such a wide range and variety of things that are out there.

Today’s video was sent to me by a client, FinPacific who provides financial treasury management software solutions to medium and large businesses. They have a corporate culture based on authenticity, congruency and honesty that is truly remarkable. It did not surprise me that they would have come across this incredibly inspirational video of a 15 year-old girl. You simply have to start watching and you’ll find yourself mesmerised by her wisdom, maturity and eloquence. She can teach us all a few life lessons!

Additional notes on the video:

http://www.INKtalks.com Like Voltaire, she believes a shipwreck gives us an opportunity to sing in the life boats. Little Aisha Chaudhary, the first INK Youth Fellow, teaches us a big lesson even as she is battling a life-threatening medical condition. All of 15, Aisha has taught herself to paint, take pictures, run with her dog and dance at her cousin’s wedding, not just once but twice. Aisha learned art at the American Embassy School. “You live every moment twice, once in your mind and once when you actually live it,” she said to a standing ovation.

Note: This talk is available with English subtitles. Click the CC button on player to view the talk with subtitles.

ABOUT INK: INKtalks are personal narratives that get straight to the heart of issues in 18 minutes or less. We are committed to capturing and sharing breakthrough ideas, inspiring stories and surprising perspectives–for free!

Watch an INKtalk and meet the people who are designing the future–now.

http://www.INKtalks.com

ABOUT AISHA CHAUDHARY: Fifteen year-old Aisha Chaudhary was born with an immune deficiency disorder and overcame a predicted life expectancy of only one year to have become an accomplished artist today. Despite a serious lung disease called Pulmonary Fibrosis, her persistent optimism, extraordinary maturity in the face of impossible odds, and calm perspective on life’s challenges have been an inspiration to many.

Subtitling credits : Aishwarya S.

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